“If her mother is going to dictate what I wear for my wedding, then I don’t wanna get married. AITA?”
Her mother who is somewhat well to do is paying for a lot of things, including her dress, catering, alcohol many other stuff and her father, who is divorced from her mother is paying for the venue. My family is paying for the rehearsal dinner and my dad is paying for the honeymoon trip.
Her mother who is a bit of a control freak has made her mission to choose what everyone should wear. She chose my fiancee dress even though she had wanted a different one. She chose the colors for the groomsmen and bridesmaids. She is even trying to dictate what color my family should wear.Before even she got involved, I had decided to get married in a brown double breasted suit that I would get custom-made for me specifically. I already got everything set up and I have already chosen my bespoke tailor.
To have a preview of what the suit will look like I generated an AI image of the same color of the suit and I showed it to my fiancé to see if she likes it or not. She likes it and she really think that it will look very good on me and it will go perfect with the colors of the of the venue and all as well as the what the other people are wearing.Apparently, my future mother-in-law does not like the suit or at least the color and she has decided to send me different colors that I should go for instead of the brown.I am not totally against choosing a different color or anything, but the fact the issue is that her choice are terrible. Ahe apparently wants me to wear a pink skinny suit that looks terrible and cheaply made. (See pictures)My brown suit.Her pink suit.I told my fiancé that I do not want to wear the suit that she’s suggesting or even asking me to wear and that’s the end of it. but my my fiancé is saying I should consider her mom is paying for a lot of things and that I should consider.I told her if her mom is going to dictate what I should wear at my own wedding then I do not want to get married. Now she’s mad and calling me an arsehole for not considering the opinions of others. AITA?
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
Rough-Medicine5183
Boom y’all get married right? Down the line she gets pregnant. Then it’s gonna be my mom doesn’t like that name for said baby she likes this q more. Remember she did pay for a lot of our wedding.
NTA If this is the hill you have to die on so be it. Because if she can run over you now that’s going to be your whole marriage. Good luck and keep us updated. Aw that suit looks good too.
Dlraetz1
And if we name the baby Ermatrude Mom will buy a new car that’s safer for the baby. Money will be held over OP’s head their whole lives together. I think I know why fiancés dad left.
No-Long5784
It’s obviously very clear that if mom is paying, it’s her way or the highway. I wonder how that’s going to turn out with kids involved….my guess is probably not good. But sadly it sounds like your finacee doesn’t care since mommy is paying. NTA. Run.
VegetableBusiness897
Keep the brown suit and stand your ground. Tell her she can cancel the wedding over the suit if she wants… But that is your suit. Then sit down and have a genuine conversation with your fiancé. Tell her in order for a marriage to work you have to work as a team and put each other first. And if she can’t, maybe she shouldn’t marry you.
cinekat
NTA and get out of there before your future house, job, choice of pet and kids names are chosen by her.
butterflya82
NTA. Your future wife should have your back. Maybe she’s scared to speak up knowing what her mum is like but this is your wedding and surly you get to pick what you want to wear. Even say let’s have a small intimate wedding then uz can chose everything.
Upwrdmblty_496
NTA. Run far far away. She will control everything about both of your lives, then the lives of any eventual children. Do not marry this woman. DO NOT have children with this woman!!!
snootgoo
Brown seems like the right color for this wedding because you are marrying into a shitty family. Run now before this becomes your daily normal. NTA.
Additional_Bus_9646
You have considered “the opinions of others” and rejected them. (Very reasonable, in my opinion. How many men want to wear a pink suit . . . EVER?) How long have you known your fiancé and what is your general opinion of the family dynamics? Remember that when you get married, you marry the family. Think hard about this.
Somuchallthetime
NTA. This is just the tip of the iceberg. Your finance needs a backbone. Paying for something doesn’t mean control. If you still want to go through with the wedding, tell MIL okay and just do what you want anyway. What’s she going to do in the day of? Storm off cause you wore the “wrong” color? lol
No-Shock-2055
NTA. You need a fiancee who will stand up for you and not sell you out to the highest bidder. The fact that your feelings don’t matter because you fiancee’s mommy is financing the wedding is a big red flag. Imagine how overbearing she’s going to be if your ever have kids?
If you think you won’t have to put up with this crap for the rest of your life, you’re deluding yourself. This is a major red flag. If your fiancee can’t get on the same page about YOUR feelings as opposed to mommy’s money, then you’re smart to not get married. Also, the brown suit is gorgeous. The pink suit is peak cringe.
