I (29F) am 5 months pregnant with our first child and on Friday night (technically Saturday morning) I woke up at 2am with some cramps and tenderness in my lower abdomen. It got progressively worse over the next 30 minutes and I finally woke my husband (30M) to tell him I think we should go to the hospital.

Because it was the middle of the night, my husband waited until 9am to inform any family about the situation. He texted his parents, my mother, and his sister that I was in the hospital getting some tests done, but the doctors don’t seem too concerned and he’ll reach out once we get more info.

About 45 minutes later, his aunt texted him that she was hoping for the best. Then his other aunt texted him. His sister called him and warned him that my MIL posted on Facebook “My daughter in law is in the hospital in serious condition, please send thoughts and prayers to my unborn grandbaby. We may lose him or her!”

When my husband got off the phone, he left the room and I could hear him talking down the hall. When he came back, I asked him what was up and he said he’d tell me later once we know everything’s ok. It turns out a section of my intestines is inflamed and that was causing what felt like cramps. I’ll need to follow up with my GP as it could be a chronic thing, but it’s not related to the pregnancy and shouldn’t affect it at all. Thankfully, baby is ok. 🙂 I was discharged just after 1pm and when we got home my husband told me what happened. He had left the room to call her and tell her to take the post down and she said it’s her Facebook and he can’t control what she posts. I texted my MIL, “Please remove the post about me. It is a major breach of trust to disclose this medical incident without my consent, especially to do so as publicly as you did.

[Husband’s name] and I are very private people and we’d appreciate not having our personal information posted on Facebook. Please let me know when you’ve removed the post.” She didn’t reply, but the post is deleted. My MIL later called my husband and told him I sent an incredibly rude text to her and he said he read it before I sent it and it wasn’t rude, it was accurate. We’re both annoyed and frustrated, but also really hurt that she used what could have been a tragedy to get attention for herself on freaking Facebook. My husband is going to call her in a few days, after everyone calms down, and tell her we don’t want her disclosing any information about us or she won’t get any info in the future. He haven’t had the “no photos of LO on social media” discussion with family yet, but he’s going to address it then. Wish him luck!

Here’s what people had to say to OP:

Theslowestmarathoner

If this is the starting point with her this is going to very very bad very fast when the baby comes.

northern225

Word of advice, don’t tel MIL when you go into labour, the name, or any other piece of information you don’t want public. Her response shows she is unrepentant and will likely do it again.

Your husband should definitely speak with her and make it clear nothing is to be posted without your consent and he should follow up with a text after so she can’t claim he never said it. He’s the son, you shouldn’t be the one messaging or enforcing boundaries.

buckeye-person

The time to stop giving her information is now. Some boundaries don’t deserve a 2nd chance. It isn’t like you will never see her again, you just wont give her sensitive information. Stop telling her important things now, not after she does it again.

Background-Place-795

“MIL I’m not rude. I’m just not prioritizing your comfort.”

1000% info diet. She’s already proven she can’t handle information without defaulting to Main Character Syndrome. I wouldn’t tell her when you’re in labour, either! 🙄

Katiew84

Why would you even consider giving her information going forward? She already lost that privilege. Also, do not tell her when you’re in labor. In fact, cease all contact with her around 2 weeks before your due date. ALL CONTACT.

This way, when you do go into labor and you’re unreachable she won’t be tipped off by not being able to reach you and your husband. She will share your birth news before you can. Don’t give her the opportunity to do so.

Ok_Poem5181 (OP)

I already told him she will find out when we are home and behind locked doors. Because I know she will do exactly this.

Budget_University_56

Block her FB. Any future texts from concerned people who read about your private matters in her FB post should be told: “we appreciate your concern. Unfortunately our wishes to keep our private life off of [MIL]’s FB were ignored. We ask for privacy at this time.” SHAME her!

l00zrr

If she thought the text you sent was rude, boy is she weak and immature. He can call her and let her know its easy no posts, no sharing of info or no sharing of info. She will be the last to know.

TrueAgency8491

She is shocking!!! She didnt just post your info She overdramatised it for special effect! You need to realise that nothing you tell her will remain confidential! Can you get a little ‘Oscar’ replica and send it to her for ‘best screenplay’?

No-Interaction-8913

This is also a great opportunity for you (and her) to consider how this kind of behaviour will impact her relationship with your family going forward. Kid getting some testing done? Not something she needs to know. Someone’s facing mental health struggles? She may not be a safe person to share that with.

You’re all down with a big and have it coming out both ends? Nope, not unless you want her telling everyone and their dog. Baby’s name? Birth announcement before you’ve told every other person you know? Potential move or job change or almost anything?

My daughter had a very minor birth defect and we didn’t tell mil specifically because this is exactly what she’d do, monetize it for attention for herself. So there’s this thing about our daughter she’ll never know because she can’t be trusted. That’s pretty big.

So, what do you think of this one? If you could give the OP any advice here, what would you tell them?