“She wants us to change everything for an elopement we didn’t even know existed.”
I(f30) need to vent about the absolute Main Character energy my cousin, Monica (f29), is radiating right now. My brother, Leo(m34) and his fiancée, Sarah (f32), recently announced they’re getting married in Las Vegas on February 28th.They’re super excited—they’ve already booked the chapel, paid for the hotel, and have everything finalized. When I mentioned the date to my cousin Monica, she didn’t say “Congratulations to them!” or “how exciting!”Instead, she had a literal meltdown. Apparently, Monica and her partner have been planning to elope in Vegas on that exact same day for a while. The catch? It was a total secret. She never told a single person in the family.No announcement, no save the date, nothing!! Now, she’s spiraling and accusing Leo and Sarah of “slapping her in the face” and “stealing her moment.” She is genuinely convinced that they somehow “targeted” her, even though there is no way they could have known her secret date.
Monica has also insinuated that I try to talk to Sarah about changing her their date. Her elopement is private (zero guests!!!) My brother’s wedding is a family event and he has already paid non-refundable deposits. I told her that it’s a crazy coincidence but no one is moving their date. Since then, she has unfollowed me on Instagram and stopped speaking to me.
It’s now a multi-generational war. Monica’s mom is actually defending and enabling this behavior. Now my aunt and my mom are have contention because my aunt keeps hinting and insinuating to my mom that Leo should move his entire wedding to accommodate a secret elopement that doesn’t even involve guests.So, because my brother picked a date that happened to be “his” but was also secretly “hers” in her head, he and Sarah are the villains. Monica is currently holding a grudge from behind a blocked profile, and our moms aren’t speaking like they normally do.
Imagine being so entitled that you think you own a date you never even told anyone you wanted. Vegas has hundreds of weddings a day, but apparently, Feb 28th is Monica’s Property.This is so absurd to me and I feel like Monica and her enabling mom live in crazy town… They’re both making me and my mom feel bad about something that we had no idea about.
Here’s what people had to say to OP:
NixKlappt-Reddit
It’s easier to shift a secret elopement without guests than a wedding with guests.
I am wondering why the family is mad about you and not about the secret elopement without them?
FaultOne2738 (OP)
I mentioned this too and Monica has already put deposit down and paid for travel and accommodations. She and her mom are upset with me and my mom about not understanding her feelings and essentially not asking my brother to move his date. We were a bit upset about not being included, but understand that ultimately, it’s their day, their choice who they want to involve.
chicagok8
If you aren’t invited anyway, it’s crazy that they care! Do they think you’re going to try to crash their secret wedding? So weird.
literacyisamistake
I bet they care because they were going to announce it after the fact, then ask for gifts. But now, their gift grab won’t be as effective because people will naturally prioritize gifts for the wedding they were actually allowed to attend.
Truebeliever-14
She should have kept it a secret.
FaultOne2738 (OP)
This would have been better for everyone lol.
Boring-Experience-42
Boohoo cousin. Sucks to be her. So she had a completely separate, SECRET event that she was NOT inviting the family to. But finds a way to make herself the victim and your brother the villain. Negative ghost rider.
That is not how real life works. Cousin needs to grow the F up and stop acting like an entitled toddler. She wasn’t having others at her wedding, your brother is. There is literally zero effect on her wedding day.
This either boils down to she is feeling slighted because the wedding attention is not on her (duh secrets elopement) and is on your brother and FSIL, orrrrrr. She thinks she owns the date. Either way she is being an Uber B for making this about her or allowing it to irrupt into a family feud.
Tell them to enjoy the elopement as the family will be enjoying your brother‘s wedding and stop worrying about the feelings of entitled nincompoops. Then go hug your mom and brother and tell them that as long as you are all there aunty DumbDumb and her princess progeny can kick rocks.
1Fully1
Vegas is an enormous town. It is highly unlikely that y’all will see each other if you are there at the same time. Who cares if they have the same wedding day as your brother. They weren’t invited to his wedding snd y’all aren’t invited to their wedding from what I paid attention to. So just each wedding should happen and why does it matter?
FaultOne2738 (OP)
I did let Leo and Sarah know just so they’re aware, but not that Monica is upset. I agree that Vegas is a huge place and we most likely won’t run into each other. Monica is making it a huge deal and taking it out on my mom and I for being the messengers.
This is the part I’m bothered by. Not sure what she’s planning to do, but my brother plans to continue with his plans and Sarah has even said, “the 28th will be filled with so much love.”
Only-upvibes
So Cousin planned on posting she just got married on all her media sites and bath in the shocked friends, well wishes and congratulations post!! But now she feels it will be overshadowed by the fact that another family member will be posting wedding pictures on the same day.
Her pictures will only have the 2 of them. Brother’s pictures will be flanked with family from both sides. Makes her look a bit selfish for not having any family, ruining the “surprise elopement “. I bet the more she thought about it the more she realized how about it’s gonna look. Especially on your mom and aunt‘s side of the family. Main Character gets burned!
So, what do you think of this one? If you could give the OP any advice here, what would you tell them?
