So I’m getting married in October and am beyond excited. I am having one small issue with my mother. My parents are divorced and my dad comes from a family of 5 kids (big family) which has given me a large extended family. My mom has a small family. She is one of two and she and her brother do not talk anymore. Her mom, my grandma, whom I was very close with is too sick to attend and her dad, my grandpa, has passed.

Now to the situation. My mother has been trying to invite some of her friends who I do not like. Her friends are not my friends and I don’t really care to have them at my wedding. I’ve tried to calmly say they’re not my family and I do not care for them to come and she has answered back “but John’s family is coming” (my dad) and I have to answer “no, not johns family, my family” and the response has not been kind. She feels as though it’s unfair my dad has a support system at the wedding and she does not. I somewhat understand but they are not only his support system, they are my aunts, uncles, and first cousins, approx 20 in total.

Our wedding is small, it’s 80 people and we have kept our list to just blood relatives and close personal friends. We are trying to keep our wedding small and intimate while not breaking the bank budget wise. The kitchen at the venue can also only host 90 people so we’ve been trying to keep under that number comfortably.

Back to my mother. I’m trying to stand my ground and tell her I do not want these people in attendance. I’ve even responded with “if I have a relationship with that people, I’m happy to consider” but the people she wants to bring, I’ve not met or haven’t seen since being young.

We had a phone call tonight and she has kept pushing me and I finally said plain and simple, I do not want these people here. Her response has been a lot. Things like “Absolutely ridiculous for you you to fight me on this…” “Im not your doormat” and “I’m not going to stand for this”

I’m at the point now where I’ve had enough. Do I just cave in and let her friends come or do I double down on how I feel and keep saying no. Am I the asshole

This is other people